You know what I haven't done in a long time?

Poured a glass of wine, cranked the tunes, and leisurly prepared dinner.

Ok, so I've poured a glass of wine recently (or two.) (ok, or three.).

But I used to do that every night. Every single night. I'd pour a glass of my favourite wine, put something easy on the cd player (Celine Dion - hey, don't judge! I've just hopped on the Celine bandwagon with the release of her latest - Blue Rodeo, Harry Chapin, Alison Krauss, you get the picture), and headed to the kitchen to plan and prepare dinner. Light a few candles (although this time of year it's still light out), and really really enjoy myself.

So that's what I'm going to do.

Right now.

Urs.

You know what's weird?

I'm not pregnant.

And we tried so hard! We did everything according to all the websites, ovulation kits, advice, yada yada yada.

And we didn't get pregnant.

See? You really can't control anything.

So here we are.

Not pregnant.

But having sex all the time with the intent to have some fun. To enjoy each other. (To get pregnant.)

But not putting a charge on getting pregnant. Putting a charge on enjoying ourselves. Twisting up the energetics a bit.

If that's possible.

Because, energetically, there's still, no matter how much we try to fool ourselves, a charge on the getting pregnant bit.

My cycle has changed over the past 3 months, so we're covering all bases by having sex every day. So we're having lots of fun! And the sex is getting better! The Husband is surprising me along the way, too....doing things to me that I only fantasize about. I must say, especially yesterday morning (we're morning sex people!), I was completely taken aback, in a GREAT way, by what he shocked me with. Good times. I hope this isn't crass, but I think I'll jump him as soon as he walks through the door tonight.

And surprise him right back.

Urs.